A teacher was taking a math's class, suddenly the principal came in for inspection and asked a question to the class.
"If a train is moving at the rate of 30km/h then what is my age now?"
Nobody including the teacher was able to answer. After a while a dull fellow raised his hand and said "50 sir". The answer was surprisingly correct.
"Absolutely Right Little Genius" Replied the Principal" But how could you calculate so accurately?, what was the formula behind?".
The boy said,"It's Simple! We have a neighbor of age 25 and the doctor says he is half crazy"
Thursday, April 2, 2009
who discovered america
TEACHER: Johnny, go to the map and find North America.
JOHNNY: Here it is!
TEACHER: That's Correct!. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Johnny!
JOHNNY: Here it is!
TEACHER: That's Correct!. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Johnny!
My exam
It was the final examination for an introductory English course at the local university. The examination was two hours long, and exam booklets were provided. The professor was very strict and told the class that any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours would not be accepted and the student would fail. A half hour into the exam, a student came rushing in and asked the professor for an exam booklet.
"You're not going to have time to finish this," the professor stated sarcastically as he handed the student a booklet.
"Yes I will," replied the student. He then took a seat and began writing. After two hours, the professor called for the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in. All except the late student, who continued writing. A half hour later, the last student came up to the professor who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there.
"No you don't, I'm not going to accept that. It's late." The student looked incredulous and angry.
"Do you know WHO I am?"
"No, as a matter of fact I don't," replied the professor.
"DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" the student asked again.
"No! and I don't care." replied the professor with an air of superiority.
"Very Good," replied the student and quickly lifted the stack of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and ran out of the room.
"You're not going to have time to finish this," the professor stated sarcastically as he handed the student a booklet.
"Yes I will," replied the student. He then took a seat and began writing. After two hours, the professor called for the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in. All except the late student, who continued writing. A half hour later, the last student came up to the professor who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there.
"No you don't, I'm not going to accept that. It's late." The student looked incredulous and angry.
"Do you know WHO I am?"
"No, as a matter of fact I don't," replied the professor.
"DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" the student asked again.
"No! and I don't care." replied the professor with an air of superiority.
"Very Good," replied the student and quickly lifted the stack of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and ran out of the room.
A real son
A father walks by this son's bedroom and stops. He heard him say, " God bless Mommy, Daddy and Grandma. Ta Ta Grandpa."
The father did not know what the boy meant but he was glad his son was praying.
The next day he found Grandpa died. That night he went to his sons room and heard his son praying,
" God bless Mommy and Daddy. Ta Ta Grandma."
The dad was scared but waited till morning. And sure enough Grandma was died.
That night he went his sons room again and heard him praying, "God bless Mommy. Ta Ta Daddy."
The Dad way really scared. He didn't sleep all night. In the morning he went to the doctor to check him.
When he came home he saw his wife. His wife said,
" Thank God you're here, Honey!!! we found the Milkman dead on the front porch this morning!!"
The father did not know what the boy meant but he was glad his son was praying.
The next day he found Grandpa died. That night he went to his sons room and heard his son praying,
" God bless Mommy and Daddy. Ta Ta Grandma."
The dad was scared but waited till morning. And sure enough Grandma was died.
That night he went his sons room again and heard him praying, "God bless Mommy. Ta Ta Daddy."
The Dad way really scared. He didn't sleep all night. In the morning he went to the doctor to check him.
When he came home he saw his wife. His wife said,
" Thank God you're here, Honey!!! we found the Milkman dead on the front porch this morning!!"
Mother and father relationship
A woman takes her 4 year old son in for his yearly well child visit to The doctor.
The doctor asks the little boy, "Do you know your name?"
He tells her, "Yes my name is Johnny."
"And Johnny, do you know your mom's name?"
"Yes her name is Mommy," said little Johnny.
"And what is Mommy's real name?"
And little Johnny says, "it's Tammy."
"That is great," the doctor told Johnny.
Then the doctor asked, "And what is your daddy's name?"
Little johnny said, "it is daddy."
Finally the doctor asked, "And what does mommy call him?"
little Johnny looked up innocently and replied, "Asshole."
The doctor asks the little boy, "Do you know your name?"
He tells her, "Yes my name is Johnny."
"And Johnny, do you know your mom's name?"
"Yes her name is Mommy," said little Johnny.
"And what is Mommy's real name?"
And little Johnny says, "it's Tammy."
"That is great," the doctor told Johnny.
Then the doctor asked, "And what is your daddy's name?"
Little johnny said, "it is daddy."
Finally the doctor asked, "And what does mommy call him?"
little Johnny looked up innocently and replied, "Asshole."
understnading politics
Son: Dad, I have a special report for school. Can I ask you a question?
Dad: Sure son, what's the question?
Son: What is politics?
Dad: Well son, let's take our home for example. I am the wage earner, so let's call me the management. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so let's call her the government. We take care of you and your needs, so let's call you the people. We'll call the maid the working class and your baby brother the future. Understand?
Son: I'm not really sure dad, I'll have to think about it.
That night, the boy is awakened by his baby brother's crying, so he went to see what was wrong. Discovering that the baby had a heavily soiled nappy, the boy went to his parent's room and found his mother fast asleep. He than went to the maid's room, where, peeking through the keyhole, he saw his father in bed with the maid. The boy's knocking went totally unheard. The boy went back to his room and went to sleep.
The next morning...
Son: Dad, I think I understand politics.
Dad: That's great son, explain it to me in your own words.
Son: While the management is screwing the working class, the government is fast asleep, the people are being completely ignored and the future is full of shit
Dad: Sure son, what's the question?
Son: What is politics?
Dad: Well son, let's take our home for example. I am the wage earner, so let's call me the management. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so let's call her the government. We take care of you and your needs, so let's call you the people. We'll call the maid the working class and your baby brother the future. Understand?
Son: I'm not really sure dad, I'll have to think about it.
That night, the boy is awakened by his baby brother's crying, so he went to see what was wrong. Discovering that the baby had a heavily soiled nappy, the boy went to his parent's room and found his mother fast asleep. He than went to the maid's room, where, peeking through the keyhole, he saw his father in bed with the maid. The boy's knocking went totally unheard. The boy went back to his room and went to sleep.
The next morning...
Son: Dad, I think I understand politics.
Dad: That's great son, explain it to me in your own words.
Son: While the management is screwing the working class, the government is fast asleep, the people are being completely ignored and the future is full of shit
Monday, March 30, 2009
Mother
Miss Sana had been giving her students a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron.
Now it was question time, and she asked, "My name begins with the letter 'M' and I pick up things. What am I?"
A little boy on the front row proudly said, "You're a mother!"
Now it was question time, and she asked, "My name begins with the letter 'M' and I pick up things. What am I?"
A little boy on the front row proudly said, "You're a mother!"
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